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2002-09-17

10:34 a.m.

Every day, in every way I am getting better and better. That is the mantra or affirmation on the �Fight for your Life� video I got from the cancer center last week when I was on my posi-attitude mission. The video seemed reasonable until D walked in and made a comment about its 1980s production value. It�s so fun living with cancer and a cultural critic the same time, he keeps me on my toes.

I am anticipating that post-chemo breakthrough feeling at any moment. The one moment when you just stop being nauseous. It�s fantastic. Usually I run out to Avalon and get some of that Body and Soul Super Special Fancy Aroma Love Luva Blend coffee. I can�t stand the smell or taste of coffee up until my chemo breakthrough moment. Pre-cancer I used to treat myself to a pot a day. I will probably take this opportunity to cut down since I heard a rumor that Sharon Stone cured herself of Lymphoma by cutting out caffeine. But really, where is she now?

In the months I have spent reading about cancer and listening to people�s advice and tips on how they don�t have cancer I realize that most people refuse to accept what is random or biological destiny. I suppose I�m not exactly accepting of the cancer seeing as how it�s been mercilessly blasted out of my body by this point but I am not going to give up the occasional pound bag of Doritos simply because it might reduce my odds for future malignancy.

In fact now that I have Fought For My Life, gone through chemo and the emotional trial of obtaining insurance referrals I have decided that maybe I should have more Doritos and drink even more expensive coffee. Who knows? I might have lived through the first stage of cancer treatment but Blue Care Network could send it�s insurance thugs to physically squeeze another copay out of me or hang me out to dry because Sally Two-Do at the front desk of radiation therapy lost my referral. I am going to make a new video �Fight for your Life: Insurance companies, loop holes and jugular veins.�

huh? - 2004-01-15
resolutions - 2004-01-09
video reason - 2003-12-30
sik - 2003-12-06
voiceless - 2003-11-19

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